What’s Love got to do with it?

I’m in the midst of NRE (new relationship energy!) We’re 3 months into it and at that point where we’ve established mutuality; we’re really enjoying each others’ company and mutual exploration. I’m also happy that I’m seeing that I’ve actually matured a bit and have learned a thing or two that’s helping with all this […]

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Masturbation & Relationships

Many people think that masturbation is a substitute for partnered sex. I see men who feel as if they need to hide their masturbation from their partners. We spend a lifetime hiding masturbation from others – parents, roommates, partners. For me, it’s not an or, it’s an and. Partnered sex is a way of connecting with […]

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Online Dating

I’ve recently had several conversations with guys looking to get back in the dating pool again after a long absence. The conversation invariably turns toward online dating. While we can bemoan the rise of online dating and the decline of flirting, the reality is that online dating is here and not going away so we […]

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Faerie Wisdom


I just returned from 10 days with the Radical Faeries celebrating Beltane. This was my first Beltane celebration and my first extended experience with the Faeries. The entire experience unfolded rather quickly. I wasn’t planning on going until, almost at the last minute, the opportunity presented itself and I was on my way. I’m still going through […]

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(Mis)Adventures in Polyamory

I haven’t been monogamous in decades. I tried it and realized that monogamy doesn’t work for me. I find that sex with multiple people opens my horizons and provides me with more diverse sexual experiences and more opportunities for sexual exploration that I would get by restricting my encounters to only one person. I’m very experienced at non-monogamy. […]

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The most common thread I hear from men is a longing for connection. I’m not talking about casual friends, acquaintances or hookups. Rather, I’m talking about true, real connection with another human. True connection is hard. It requires us to be our genuine self. We have to come into connection with all our doubts, our […]

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Being Ourselves Online

The recent newsletter about connection really seems to have struck a chord. I was thinking more about this and realized that many of us have online profiles. Some are for dating others are for hookups and others are just for friends. Many of us have also experienced meeting people online. Yet how many of our […]

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Practicing Connection

Being in connection can be really hard to do. We don’t have lots of practice at it Oh sure, there are attempts, an example is what I call corporate connection – connection at work. It usually look like lots of eye contact and close listening. But actually, the eye contact is more of a stare-through. […]

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