Close

body image

Acceptance

Since most of us struggle with periods of self-hatred, bad body images, shame and confusion over sex and pleasure, I recommend having a hot love affair with yourself. Sexual healing begins by learning how to turn yourself on, discovering your sexual fantasies, and giving yourself an abundance of selflove and orgasms. Betty Dodson Gay men […]

Read More

I’m Not A Walking Penis (Most of the Time)

1205_eek-a-penis

I recently came across this post where the author made a case our culture doesn’t understand the male sex drive. There’s a pernicious myth out there that the male sex drive is unstoppable and irresistible–that once a man is aroused, he literally cannot control his actions.  We tell jokes about “thinking with the other head” and “all the […]

Read More

Am I Good Enough?

One of the most common concerns men have is a variation on “Am I good enough.” This gets reinforced for many of us when younger by our often mistaken notions of what is masculinity. We’re constantly trying to measure up to some, often undefined, ideal. When I was a young boy I clearly got the […]

Read More

Valentine’s Day

IMGP1272-sm

So Valentine’s day is Friday. This holiday is usually associated with romantic love or bloody massacres (or both!) I’m kinda a romantic at heart. I love the support, smooching, touching and physical and emotional intimacy that romantic love can provide. I’m also aware that romantic love is culturally loaded and full of unrealistic expectations. Valentine’s […]

Read More

Genital Shame

Junk. What did that term become popular? I’m sorry but neither my penis, my balls nor even my asshole is junk. Culturally we seem to have three primary ways of referring to our genitals: clinical, vulgar or cute. I really don’t like any of these but I’ve settled on clinical. Cute terms are just too […]

Read More

Measuring Up

post130802

Body Dysmorphia (not liking our own body) is very common in men. There are many parts of the body that we can feel shame around, but penis size is one of, if not the most common concern. A lot of us compare ourselves to images of naked men that we may see often. Most of […]

Read More

Being Ourselves Online

The recent newsletter about connection really seems to have struck a chord. I was thinking more about this and realized that many of us have online profiles. Some are for dating others are for hookups and others are just for friends. Many of us have also experienced meeting people online. Yet how many of our […]

Read More

I’m Not My Type

I’m Not My Type So many of us go through life feeling that we’re undesirable. We look at ourselves in the mirror and conclude that no one could possibly find us attractive. I see this all the time when coaching men. While there are many factors that can contribute to this feeling, I believe that, […]

Read More

Penis Size

Almost every man in our culture is concerned about the size of his penis. I remember the scene vividly even though it was over 30 years ago. It way my first high school PE class. This was back in a time when we were FORCED to change before class and shower afterward. I remember PE […]

Read More